Like a Rolling Stone…

Don’t you ever take an advertisement for granted…

Story Summary [Make the blender blend unusual objects]
Date [between 1997 and 1998 – I was 13 to 14 years old]
That day I decided to test whether the blender would really ‘blend everything’, as said in the advertisement.
My goal was to validate that the poweful Pic-Lic blender liquefies all you want it to.
Test Approach: Stress testing, blender motor and blades should be strong enough – Equivalence.
The result: FAIL- blender does not blend everything, plus no recoverability at all.
The lessons I’ve learnt: it is a very dangerous experiment. Pieces could have been thrown against me or I could even have set the place on fire.

Description of the experiments:

So, by the end of nineties a famous brazilian brand of home appliances released a new version of what they would call multiprocessor. It was a blender with stronger blades and a stronger motor that should be able to mix the thickier of the mixtures.

Guess what?! Have you ever wondered I would loose the opportunity to try and make that thing blend something really stupid? No, I mean incredibly stupid, like a glass for example?

You’re right. I did not leave this opportunity go by.

I was used to see people blending tomatoes to make sauce. I was also used to see them mixing onions, and also milk-shakes.

What I never saw people doing was mixing things like a whole egg. Or perhaps ice rocks. Maybe a k n i f e. Uhmm, a glass?! (come on, why the hack would somebody want to ‘blend’ a knife? Well, don’t ask me to explain, I just had some random thoughts. How different it is from when you try to inject a sql query into a Name field? Have you ever seen seomeone called “SELECT COUNT(*) FROM tabname”? Nope. So text fields should be injection-resistant as well as blenders should be non-liquefiable objects resistant. Just that simple 😛

Let me go on with the story…

So I opened the counter, mounted the blender and plugged it in the power. It looked so shiny new. And it sounded so smooth, just like a V8 engine idling.

Next, just to see it working, I grabbed a small glass of water to put some in the blender. Then pressed the power button. Nothing exciting.

Ok, now the hardcore part begins. ICE ROCKS…YEAHHH!!!!
I opened the fridge and picked up three ice rocks. But I had to put them back because I wouldn’t have them melting in my hand. By this time I realized my plan had a mistake. Would I throw the rocks inside the blender while it was running, or should I put them and then start??

hmm…let’s make it work the heavy way. I got the rocks back and put them in a way they would lock the blades. I wanted to see how powerful was that motor.

Press power and

GZZZZ. PRRRRRRT.

Mixed. Blender passed this test.

Next – an egg. So I threw that water and crushed ice away and took an egg.

Again, better to put the egg to mix while the blender is running or stopped? Well, better start it with the egg already there, because while running I should open the lid, and by doing that I would mess up with the kitchen.

Nothing special. Just crushed the egg. Inedible omelete.

Now that was what I was looking forward to see…the glass!!!!
But then I started to think like a grown up child. I would break the glass, and while cleaning the blender up the pieces would most likely hurt me. So the glass was out of scope.

Knife. Yes, my friend. A Knife. L e o    w a s    a b o u t    t o    p u t    a    k n i f e    i n s i d e    t h e    b l e n d e r   c u p, and I do not have a good explanation for that. Maybe that’s because it was a kind of a Ginsu knife and I wanted to see a real battle between blender blades and Ginsu.

For some reason I put the knife upside down inside the blender. I was considering the fact that the knife would most likely end up being useless, and so would the blender blades. So I went to the soft: the plastic handle. It would suffer a bit, but then I would take the knife to the garden and leave it there. People always need a knife when gardening.

Good. The knife was already inside the blender. It took me only 10 seconds from the moment I pressed power button to the moment I released it. The noise was so high that it really got me shocked.

The knife got a shockingly ugly handle whet I took it outside the mixer cup. It looked jagged like a pencil that someone usually bites.

The blender…yeah, you know. The blades were looking somewhat different. They were Bent.
Also the blending cup was all cut.

And so cut were my privileges at home: internet, weekend at granma’s, video-game.

Last thing I remember is that I was grounded for the weekend.

And I’m glad the sound of that knife inside the blender scared me. Next step would be to mix some gravels. That would have been the end of a blender.

That’s all.

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You better run, better run, faster than my brake…

Figura

Story Summary [Start the car with the gearbox in the 1st gear without stepping the clutch pedal]
Date
[between 1992 and 1993 – I was 8 to 10 years old]
That day I decided to test
whether the parking brake or the engine would win the fight.
My goal was to validate that
the car would never run if the parking brake was on.
Test Approach:
Acceptance test for the parking brake feature.
The result:
PASS – brake wins.
The lessons I’ve learnt:
never do this far from home or you will get in trouble.

Description of the experiments:
I was a pretty hyperactive kid who loved to spend his time inside a car, pretending to be driving. I was also very close to my grandfather Ewaldo, who would let me do almost everything I wanted.

One day I went with him to a club where he usually would play cards with this friends. I told him I wanted to stay inside the car to listen to some music. So he left me inside the car WITH the car keys and stayed there inside the club playing cards.

(By the way, the car was a 1988 Ford Del Rey Ghia, which used to be my granpa’s favorite model. He was very fond of Fords, specially this model.)

Half an hour passed since my granpa left the car. I was there “driving” the car for quite a while, so I got tired of just pretending to be driving that car without any engine sound.

And there comes Evil Leo’s ideas…

What if I turn on the car
and step the gas pedal
and turn the steering wheel
and turn on the air conditioning
and play with the power window buttons…..

Well, I started doing all that and it took about some 15 minutes to turn out to be boring.

(Oh, I forgot to mention a few important details…since then I was really up to learn cool things, and driving was something very cool to me. By that time I already new a car should not be started without putting the gear box in the N position OR stepping on the clutch pedal, cause if I did so the car would run. There was no Poka Yoke device to avoid the car from moving, or at least trying to move)

Ok. I knew the car would run if I didn’t disengage the clutch or put the gear box in Neutral. But what I didn’t know was the effect of not doing at least of these things, PLUS leaving the parking brake activated. And that was the perfect time to give it out a try.

NHÓWÓUP.

That was the sound I heard first time the key was turned. The engine already started loosing the war. Parking brake wins round one. And, man that sounded so funny that I started to laugh and got so glad to have new findings to report to my granpa.

So I tried again and again and again…and after about 6 tries I heard the following sound when attempting to start the engine…

TÉC TÉC TÉC TÉC TÉC

Woops…that was not expected. The engine does not sound like this, I thought. I had no idea what that sound would mean.

So I tried a recovery scenario – tried to start the engine using the right way to do so, but heard the same sound.

And there comes granpa with his happy face. And he sits, says hello, and tries to start the car.

TÉC TÉC TÉC TÉC TÉC

He asked me what I did and I said I was just playing with the car.

Then he tried twice, got out of the car and started talking to the guy that was in the club entrance. I SAW the guy telling him that he saw that little boy starting the car with the gear on.

So there comes granpa back shouting some german words I will never forget…

“Kleine sch–sse junge was has du getan” – Something like “you little sh-tty boy, look what you did”

And he went back inside the club and a few minutes later he got back with 3 other fat men. He sat on the driver’s seat and the other 3 guys pulled the car to make it start…

That day we went home and I learnt so much German!!!

But besides the new German words that I added to my vocabulary, I also learnt that the engine is started by a little electronic motor, and this motor uses a lot of power from the battery. So when the car runs out of battery it won’t start, and that was pretty common in the south of Brazil back in the 80’s, when they came up with those Ethanol engines without cold start mechanism – you would make your car run out of battery just by trying to start it. I’d call it a suicidal car.

And that TÉC TÉC sound is this engine starter device not being able to turn the engine due to a low battery situation.

Last thing I remember is that I was gounded for two days.

That’s all.

About the title: Foster the People – Pumped Up Kicks

Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana…

Story Summary [Insert stones into granpa’s car exhaustion tailpipe]
Date [between 1992 and 1993 – I was 8 to 10 years old]
That day I decided to test whether the car would really not work properly if I put something into the exhaustion pipe.
My goal was to validate that the car would stop just like it did in the Beverly Hills Cop movie
Test Approach: Acceptance test for the exhaustion capacity of the engine – Equivalence.
The result: PASS – stones win.
The lessons I’ve learnt: never do this far from home or you will put someone in trouble.

Beverly Hills Cop. Did you watch this movie? I did. And not even did I watch it, but I also wanted to see what would happen if the same thing Eddie Murphy did in the car on the movie (movie, a isolated test environment) would be reproduced in the real world (world, production environment).

It was a sunny summer afternoon and there was Granpa Antônio’s (Rest in peace, ganpa – he passed away last month) Ford Corcel parked in the garage. And there were also me, one of my cousins – Ricardo, and one of my little brothers, Henrique, playing in the frontyard, planning what could we do next.

We walked inside the garage and started pulling the car back and forth, just for fun. We did that for a few minutes and then it turned out to be boring and we had to find something else to do instead.

Then the idea: “What IF….”

The scene of Eddie Murphy inserting a couple of bananas into the exhaustion tailpipe of a car just came into my mind. But there was no banana around.

What IF… we go inside the house and grab some?
-No, cause if we happen to put bananas there and the car really stops, then my grandmother Odila would know who was responsible for the act.

What IF… I get some rocks and put there?
-Humm, great idea. Pretty original, cause the effect could be the same that the bananas did in the movie, although I would only discover the truth by making it happen. Besides, the parking area was full of gravels. So I did it…

I ran outside the garage and grabbed a handful of small stones, then ran back into the garage. So I lay down under the car and started putting the rocks inside. I put about twenty pieces of stone and got tired of doing so.

Next step: start the engine. But how could I ever do that? I was too young to drive, and I had no excuse that would make granpa start the car.

Then my parents decided to go home….
-Damn, how the hell will I ever know the result of my experiment – thought I.

In the next day my family went to have lunch in my aunt’s house. Granpa and granma were supposed to be there too, but they didn’t make it.

The phone rings and I hear my aunt Ivone repeating something like “the car is not starting”.

I can clearly recall my feelings…I was freak’n scared ‘cause I knew they would somehow find out who was the responsible, but in the other hand there was that mission accomplished feeling: the test passed, Eddie Murphy was not faking it.

Next thing I remember is that I was grounded for a week.

That’s, all.

About the song, which my friend @nettofarah played today in the office right after our buddy Joshua White started singing it:

-Harry Belafonte: Banana Boat Song

Burn little tester, Burn…

When a damn curious child and a warning sign are put together, no one can imagine what is going to happen….

Story Summary [Burning a cellphone battery]
Date
[between 1994 and 1996 – I was 10 to 12 years old]
That day I decided to test
how a cell phone battery would react to fire
My goal was to validate that
the battery would explode, and how strong would that explosion be
Test Approach:
Smoke test – for real…
The result:
FAIL
The lessons I’ve learnt:
never ever try to burn a battery, cause you can really get injured – if not physically by the explosion, psychologically by your parents.

Description of the experiments:
When I was a child one of my greatest amusements was to read user’s manuals and electronic devices’ information. At that time [mid 90s] cell phones were in the beginning of their popularization, and I would have so much fun pretending to be using my father’s Motorola PT 550.
Straight to the point – so, my father bought a new battery since the one that came with the phone got bad and would not last longer than half and hour.
What did Leo do then?
I took the old battery in order to disassemble it, aiming to see how a battery pack would look like inside. But while reading the label on it’s back I saw a few warnings like:
– Do not reuse or disassemble this battery pack.
– Do not overcharge it.
– Do not SET IT ON FIRE. IT MAY EXPLODE AND OR CAUSE EXTREME INJURIES.

Place your bets on what caught my attention….
EXPLODE?? WOOAA, amazing!
Cause injuries? Béép. Dangerous. I should remain far from the test environment to keep the integrity of my own body.

So I built a plan – I picked up some old newspapers, the battery pack, alcohol, a bucked of tap water and a matchbox.
I also had to find a safe place to do my test – I decided to go to the front yard of my family’s house, so that I could set the battery on fire, close the door and inspect everything through the peephole.

FINE.

There went little Leonardo with a Motorola battery pack wrapped up on paper completely wet with alcohol.
I left the “device under test” in a “safe” distance from me, lit a bunch of matches and threw over the “device under test”. The matches just did not make to the battery, so I tried again, next time together with some paper, and this time I succeeded. There was the pack on fire.

I ran towards the door, closed it and looked through the peephole. The device stayed lying there on fire for a couple of minutes until the fire stopped, and when it did I got very VERY upsat (Damn, it didn’t explode).
I took the water bucket, opened the door threw the water over the “device under test” and started inspecting the wreckage…it became a brick of hard melt plastic, and nothing else.

Later that night my parents got home and smelt that plastic aroma, then they found  a burnt battery into the trash bin at the kitchen and they got SO mad. Who else could have done that? My three brothers – Eduardo, Henrique e Guilherme – would never do that king of thing, thought them…

So they came to me and said so many things, like I could have died, become blind, loose my hands, my arms, burn my face…well, all those things we usually hear from our parents, you know. And it always reminds me of that 2004 movie, Butterfly Effect. It makes me scared of the price I paid to become a real tester.

Next thing I remember is that I was grounded for two days. No Super Mario World that week.

What is “My Test Driven Life” all about?

Why is my life Test Driven?

Long before I could ever dream about being a professional tester, and even before knowing about the existence of such an amazing and rewarding career, my favourite activity already used to be spending time doing [little|dangerous] experiments.

When did my life turn out to be Test Driven?

Such joy started in my childhood, by the time I was that little “why? why? why?” bastard, and this behavior pattern remains still as my main motivator. It is what makes me wake up every morning and know that I got something cool to do and will learn something new, and if I won’t, at least I’ll go break something old.

What is my intention with this “My Test Driven Life” thing?

Since I am still a kid (born 1984, but my ideas are not more advanced  than those a kindergarten kid would have), in this blog you will probably read some stories that are pretty recent.
The idea behind My Test Driven Life is to share fun experiences I go through in the course of my life as well as the valuable lessons I learn each and every time something new happens.

How am I showing you the tests my life is driven by?
For the sake of your own pleasure (not to say patience) the following format is applied in all the stories I reveal here:

-Story Summary [Doing something stupid]
-Date [a close date and my age by the time the action happens]
-That day I decided to test [what]
-My goal was to validate that [what]
-Test Approach: [Smoke|Acceptance|Unit|Performance].
-The result: [PASS|FAIL]
-The lessons I’ve learnt: [what did I learn doing this test?]

-Description of the experiments:

<<here goes the long story>>

Hope you enjoy. Feedbacks are welcome, either the goods and the bads.

If you ever have a story to share, PLEASE send me an e-mail and I promise I’ll format your story and blog it here.